Green Grass.

There’s one way I can think of in which my boyfriend and I are exactly the same: we are both restless as fuck.

We both recently (like very recently… like 2017) landed full-time salary jobs in our field, which is wildly competitive. It’s a pretty big deal. We’re officially DINKs. Both of us working full-time is what we’ve talked about and looked forward to pretty much since we got together. All the money we’d have! The stability!

It’s been mere weeks and we’re already talking about what’s next, at length. Starting our own business, flipping a house, running a food truck. Getting our real estate licenses, getting into import/export, opening a bar. Will we even stay in Canada? We could go to India, the UK, the Cayman Islands, Australia. I have been like this as long as I can remember, always dealing inĀ possibilities instead of the present. And I love that he shares the same ambition and thirst for adventure.

On the one hand, it’s so freeing and inspiring. On the other, it makes living in the moment a nearly insurmountable task. When he landed his new gig, his first full-time in years and also his first in Canada, his instinct was to downplay it. He immediately moves on to the next task – paying off debt, buying a house. He doesn’t give himself a moment of celebration, rest, or peace. He didn’t even want me to buy a bottle of champagne, thought the money would be put to better use in savings. And I would be so annoyed by this if I weren’t exactly the same way.

After university, and then a year abroad, I undertook a post-grad with a very specific career path in mind. It was a small group, about 30 of us, and I was among the last to land a job in the industry. In the months of obsessive linkedin-ing and interviewing, networking and sobbing, my determination to work in this industry was iron clad. I had to prove to myself, my family and my classmates that I could do it.

But now that I’m here… I’m kind of ready for the next adventure. Nothing delights me more than imagining starting a new life on the beach in Goa, renovating houses in the Greater Toronto Area, becoming an entrepreneur. I know the grass is always greener on the other side, but it would be nice to feel content.

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